Hell No I’m Not Sending You No Damn Pic


“Can you send me a pic?”

HELL NO! I’m really aggravated by this stupid request I get from guys. All the time. Via text message.

I’m almost out of ways to respond nicely. But what I’m REALLY tempted to ask is “what the fuck do you need a damn picture of me in your phone for? You seen me in person, right? And you anticipate seeing me again right?” Well, ok.

I mean, if I’m REALLY into a guy (or have known him long enough to give him special privileges) I’ll just start posing and sending pics – and still – most likely I won’t send anything too provocative. And especially nothing provocative with my face in it with in it!  (And yes, I know sending “nudes” is the norm among certain sets these days.) I’m very photogenic and have no problem taking pics (as long as my hair and makeup are done. Lol.) But for Pete’s sake, leave me the hell alone.

Don’t get me wrong. My line of thinking isn’t that dudes just wanna jerk off to my pics. I think it’s more of an ego boost to have women’s pictures stored in their phones for convenient browsing, (or using their bright imaginations), or bragging to friends. And if the woman is beautiful and or voluptuous, all the better.

But I still think it’s tacky – because in all my single/ dating days, just about EVERY man asks. And goddamnit, it’s annoying. The request usually comes within a week after a first date – never more than that. Way too soon to expect special privileges. I mean, I went out with you, right? Okay, take that as an honor.

For instance, I got this lame message last week from a guy I hung out with once: “If you have a recent pic, may I have one please?”

My response: “I loathe that request, because every guy asks. I prefer to send when I’m motivated to. Talk to you tomorrow.”

He apologized.

I mean, duh.

FELLAS, here’s a tip: If you want to set yourself apart from the pack, one simple thing you can do is refrain from asking for pictures. That “Can you send me a goodnight picture?” request is whack as hell, and it’s unwelcome. Wait until she’s feeling you. She’ll start posing. Trust me.

And while we’re at it, scrap this question too: “Are you on Facebook?” My answer is always “yes.” And my follow-up response is “I use it for close family and friends.” And for the pesky ones “I prefer to get to know men outside of social networking.” So what. They’re only interested in looking at pictures anyway.

Well that’s my rant for the day, but if anyone could shed more light on guys fascination with having a bunch of women’s pictures in their phones, I would appreciate it.

LADIES, do you have this experience as well? Dudes always asking you to send pics? Do think that request is flaky as hell coming from someone you barely know, or am I being harsh?

While we’re at it, feel free to comment on other pet peeves you have about today’s dating game.

Categories: Advice, Inspiration, Personal Stories, Random Thoughts, Rants

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

23 replies

  1. hahaha @ good night picture. When I was in the dating game, I would ask women for pics and they would always send them. Even nudes without me asking. You have to wrap everything else up with good game. You can’t just ask for a picture. If she’s feeling you she will send a picture.


  2. those lines are lame. i think you should know who to ask and who not to ask. if i met you yesterday, no. if we have been talking for 6 months or so, maybe.


  3. Just like Reema, I would always get pics too when I ask. I guess it’s an art of asking :)?

    But I get the point overall and I would say timing is key also. A guy would randomly ask for a pic without leading up to it.

    If I’m texting with a girl and the convo naturally leads to pics, then I’d ask for a specific shot.

    But if we’re talking about Sesame Street, it’ll be so awkward to request pics.


  4. This is my biggest pet peeve like why is I’m obligated to send u a pic. Just how many females this guy gettn pics from.. .I don’t do the pic thing anymore cuz frankly they can see all ya pics on ya social network. They think its a private picture that u havnt posted yet. I don’t get it I kno some females or guys have old pics up but my pics are all new the dates say so. I don’t kno what kind of twisted $^^t these men are up too. Leave me outta it. If I feel u trust n believe u won’t have to ask for a pic.


    • Thank you for chiming in! Glad I’m not alone! Yes, they feel obligated and it does come across as sleazy. Like you said “how many females are they getting pics from” and why do they need to add mine to the collection. If I’m feeling you, pics are a small thing. But get to work! Lol


  5. The only thing worse than guys asking for a picture is them asking me to spend the night and usually this is on the first date and they think it’s a compliment. I always wonder how low have we as women degraded ourselves that men can now be so forward? Maybe it’s me but no one and I mean no one will be getting a picture of me. Bugger Off Jerks


  6. hahaha women! You can’t have it both ways. You can’t tell men to take it slow when you don’t reward men for taking it slow. This is why I always say women say they want one thing but do the complete opposite. If you’re interested in a guy you will send him pics and sleep with him on the first night. Let’s not pretend


    • Lol. Damn Reema! I’m never THAT interested! And honestly, I think a woman is more likely to make a man WAIT when she sees long-term potential in him (don’t wanna seem to easy) and give it up faster for a fling, or someone she doesn’t see herself with long term. (But we know sex and emotions change things!) And some of us stick to what we say!! SN: if I’m still interested after a month, maybe he can get a pic – of my face! Lol



  1. What Men Really Want To Know About Women | My Female Persuasion

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